NOT!! Thirty-three years ago yesterday, I gave birth to a much wished for baby girl. My little girl would have brown eyes and dark hair I was positive…of course five years earlier I was positive about that then too. NOT – Joel Damien Berti was born with blond hair and blue eyes that stayed blue. They turned out to be a beautiful blue but that’s another story for another time.
Chiara Jude Berti was born on a lovely Sunday morning in March 1977. Those were the days of Lamaz classes and all my friends encourage me to go “natural” . Maybe it was a fulfilling experience for them but for me – NOT! Everything was NOT going according to the plan; first of all I woke up with a terrific backache and since I had had back labor with Joel, I knew this was it. I’m type A and my husband at that time, Dennis, wasn’t exactly a cool character under pressure to say the least so while he was running around getting stuff (who knows what?) I hopped in the shower. I was counting the time between back twinges (my contractions) and he yells “What are you doing in there? Let’s go!” – “I”m shaving my legs”. Needless to say that didn’t go over so well and he was right – what was I doing? Propping my leg up on the shower wall to shave it and having a contraction, I almost sliced open a vein in a leg I could hardly see over my belly. Just for the record, I’m pretty sure this was the one and only time he was ever right.
Dressed and out the door and I don’t even remember what we did with Joel!?! We lived in Avon and the hospital was in Hartford and that meant we needed to go over a mountain. Dennis took off like a mad man and by the time we were going down the mountain at breakneck speed, I was yelling “oh God, I’m going to have this baby right now if you keep hitting bumps.”
Into the hospital and my first experience with the prep nurse is a disaster, she’s old, crabby and probably at the end of her shift – She doesn’t really believe in Lamaz! As soon as I was in the delivery room, I was grateful to see that I had a Lamaz-trained nurse with us. If you know anything about the LaMaz method, you know the mother to be needs a partner who can work with her through the pain. Our classes had been disastrous and he didn’t want to practice, sooooooo. It wasn’t very long before the nurse knew we were headed for hysteria so she just pushed him aside and said in a very loud voice “Listen to ME when I count and tell you when to breath in and out.” It took just a short time to get in the rhythm and Baby Berti was born fairly quickly. It turns out I slept through the first two stages and by the time I got to the hospital I was already in the crazy stage known as Transition no wonder the techniques designed for the beginning stages hadn’t worked.
She was beautiful and a little jaundiced so we both got to stay in the hospital a few more days. We had been calling her Nicole but it didn’t seem quite right. I wanted to call her Gabriella but her father said he didn’t like the nickname Gabby. I was leaving the hospital and taking my last luxurious sitz bath when in walks one of the floor nurses. She was a big Jamaican woman who looked down on me and said in her lilting accent, “Mrs. Berti, that baby don’t have a name and she is NOT leaving this hospital till you put one on that birth certificate.” OK I had been warned and duly noted. That day Baby Berti left the hospital with a beautiful name; Chiara Jude Berti. I had wanted my little angel to have an Italian name – Chiara is Italian for Clare and from that day forward she was always my Chiara de la luna, the bright and clear light of the moon.
I had visions of her distant future husband whispering in her ear, “Chiara what a beautiful name you have!” What I didn’t anticipate in her future was the constant mispronunciation of her lovely name and having to send her to school with the phonetic spelling of her name pinned on her dress!!! She blossomed into a beautiful woman with a beautiful name. She is an accomplished young woman and a loving and devoted mother. And I am so pleased that when she had her own gorgeous little girl, she chose a lovely and unique name too – Finley Ray Clark.
Happy Birthday honey, sorry this blog is belated but the pc gremlins were busy, busy, busy yesterday and I couldn’t get on the computer. 33 years is a hell of long time, where oh where did it go??
I didn’t know this story! But I loved it! No mention of Dumbo ears? And what the hell were you thinking shaving your legs!?!?! Dennis didn’t say “Holy Shit!” when he saw his own child seconds after birth? Or was that a special compliment just for me?
Love you Kiki!! Happy Birthday!!!
Great story GiGi! Only you would try to shave your legs before giving birth. Wait, I take that back Chiara would too! The apple doesn’t fall far. 🙂 I love that you used to phonetically spell Chiara on her name tag. You are always so prepared!!
Anyway, thanks for sharing! I had never heard this story and I had no idea Chiara could have been a Nicole or Gabriella. I can’t even imagine her as either!
Hope you are well. Tell Peter and the kitties I said hello!
Jojo
Well you see when you are in “transition” you can get a little nuts. So shaving my legs which were going to be in full view shortly seemed like a good idea at the time. UNTIL I was having contractions in the shower with the razor in my hand.
You are so cute to leave me a comment. I don’t believe your sweet cousin, Chiara has EVER read the blog at all!!!! I have been blogless for days because of computer problems. ARE you loving having mom there? Easter in Japan! Chiara, Finley and I will be walking in the Easter Parade. Photos will be posted. Hope the bunny is good to you.
love,
Auntie Mame
Your blog makes me realize that you haven’t found your calling yet, YOU ARE A WRITER. Noticed a didn’t say”missed your calling”, because you can still be a writer! I am so glad you chose Chiara, it’s the most Italian thing we have in the family since Dad changed his name from Angelo. Also Noni’s plastic grapes in the living room were pretty authentic Italian! LOL
I just like saying, ” My sister’s name is Chiara!(said with an Italian accent)” Seems to turn on the lady folk when I sound ethnic! LOL
So of course you must also say your name is Justin Bear-tee- in Italian phonetics. Of course I am positive you have NO PROBLEMS in the lady folk department.
I love your clarification of my calling – that is exactly what Joel would say. I have been thinking about it and your mother said she enjoyed the blogs so much she was going to try to think of a way to make some money with it.
Much love,
L
Lovely story!
Even as a child and teenager you had a wonderful ability with words. I know that was your ticket out of the neighborhood and on to college.
Now, so many lifetimes later, I see the wonderful writer I use to know reappearing. It is a joy every morning when I get to work to switch on the computer and share a wonderful smile or memory with you.
I was wondering how long it would take you to realize the gift you had many years ago has reappeared.
As I tell my neice if God gives you a gift and you don’t use it you lose it…….so get out there and figure out a way to use it.
You are SO KIND dear friend… one of my fifty goals (bucket list) was to have a book, article anything published, maybe this counts!
Hey mom,
I just got around to reading this now! Yes, now with Finley Ray in full swing 24/7 by the time I put her down to bed, I am following shortly after! BUT I knew I had to read this one b/c it was all about me and a story (for some reason) I have NEVER heard? How is that? I loved reading about it and can’t wait to share my story about Finley one day. Love you mom! And yes thank GOD my name is Chiara!
xoxo
Love you more than you can imagine!!
Happy SITS Saturday Share Day! I know its Sunday for you but it’s still Saturday on this side of the US so I’m just following instructions. (I have this “thing” called Oppositional Disorder and I’m taking this course on compliance…)
Lovely post – why is it that things like shaved legs suddenly become SOOOO important at these pivotal moments in our lives?
Becky Doughty