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Archive for the ‘Amuse-bouche du jour’ Category

Ewwwww!

100 Word Challenge

How could he bring her to the funeral of his mother, my former mother-in-law?  I suppose as the divorced ex-sister-in-law, it’s hardly my business…but, but geez, she’s disgusting.  Loud, vulgar, big shouldered, deep voice almost mannish and inappropriately dressed.

Post funeral we gather at his house.  She drinks too much, belting down beers (in the bottle) and gets louder and louder.  I exchange knowing looks with my sister-in-law, his former wife – disgusted. 

Apparently the beer worked its way through her system, time to pee.  Can you believe she actually announced, “Road trip” on her way to the bathroom!

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English: American cook, author, and television...

English: American cook, author, and television personality (August 15, 1912 – August 13, 2004). (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Today Julia Child would have been 100 years old!  I wonder what she would have cooked for breakfast? This post is in honor of a great lady, a wondrous cook and wise woman.  I was never a fan of her food. I don’t own any of her cookbooks not even the famous Mastering the Art of French Cooking!  I like French food but I guess as a young 20 year old bride I was more concerned with mastering cooking first and learning more about Italian dishes than French.  

However, I have always admired her quick wit and sharp to the point remarks.  So in honor of that laudable characteristic of hers, I am posting some of her famous remarks.

1. “The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.”

2. “Cooking is like love; it should be entered into with abandon or not at all.”
3. “If you’re afraid of butter, use cream.”
4. “The best way to execute French cooking is to get good and loaded and whack the hell out of a chicken. Bon appetit.”
5. “I think every woman should have a blowtorch.”
6. “Fat gives things flavor.”
7. “Maybe the cat has fallen into the stew, or the lettuce has frozen, or the cake has collapsed. Eh bien, tant pis. Usually one’s cooking is better than one thinks it is. And if the food is truly vile, then the cook must simply grit her teeth and bear it with a smile, and learn from her mistakes.”
8. “I think one of the terrible things today is that people have this deathly fear of food: fear of eggs, say, or fear of butter. Most doctors feel that you can have a little bit of everything.”
9. “I always give my bird a generous butter massage before I put it in the oven. Why? Because I think the chicken likes it — and, more important, I like to give it.”
10. “I think careful cooking is love, don’t you? The loveliest thing you can cook for someone who’s close to you is about as nice a Valentine as you can give.”
11. “You don’t have to cook fancy or complicated masterpieces — just good food from fresh ingredients.”
12. “Always remember: If you’re alone in the kitchen and you drop the lamb, you can always just pick it up. Who’s going to know?”
13. “I just hate health food.”
14. “Learn how to cook — try new recipes, learn from your mistakes, be fearless and above all have fun.”

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When did it happen? You’re never really sure exactly when sometime between the Fourth of July and mid-August, it’s apparent summer is waning like tonight’s moon.  The signs are all around us and they’re getting harder to ignore.

end of summer, sea grass

Lariope-Uh Oh!

Just like those hopeful crocuses signal that Winter is over and life renewing Spring is on its way, when I see the Lariope in my front yard bloom, I know with a heavy heart that Summer will soon be over!  And then there’s the candles in the window….

I have battery-operated candles in the windows of the cottage; White candles with light bulb flames, flickering or not, are status quo in Ocean Grove along with flying the American flag.  My house is very old and I don’t have the luxury of multiple outlets, so I have these candles which turn themselves on every 16 hours.  You set them when you want them to light and then each day at that time the candles go on.  Well, what’s been happening lately is that it is getting darker and darker and the candles still haven’t gone on.  Apparently we are now losing a full 2 minutes of daylight each day.  Time to adjust the candles to go on earlier…and you know what that means :(.

Of course you also can’t go into any store and NOT be assaulted with signs that the first day of school can’t far off.  File folders with exotic designs, 3-ring notebooks in a rainbow of colors, hundreds of pens, pencils and highlighters are visible everywhere.  

And need a summer dress or a pair of capri’s and you are SOL.  It makes me hot just to go into the store and see all the wool and knits and dark colors.  I feel like disoriented tourist wearing my  orange bermudas and sleeveless tangerine top as I walk around the circular displays of brown, black, gray and loden green outfits!

What signs do you see that tell you summer is over?

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English: A display of six ears of field corn w...

As I walked into Costco today and if you have been in one, you know they have a big board posted with the gas price of the day.  Actually in case you hadn’t figured it out yet, this only applies to those stores with gas pumps.  Today the gas price per gallon was $3.47 for regular.  WTF?  Last week I posted on Facebook that it was $3.35 which was already a BIG jump from the week before when it was $3.15 per gallon!

So this got me to thinking of some weird domino effect or as to what Wall-Streeters refer to as global economy.   Well maybe…. for days, no actually weeks, I have been hearing news about how horrible our corn crop is going to be.  No rain – small corn, shriveled up corn, maybe no corn.  And that means the cost of feed for cows and steers is going to go up in price due to the shortage.  Also, anyone even vaguely familiar with our basically unhealthy diet in America which seems to be based in high fructose corn syrup knows that if there is a shortage of corn, then all the products that have corn in them, will also rise in price.  It’s been estimated that upwards of 70% of our processed foods contain some corn product.  Wow, I guess EVERYTHING is going to go up in price.  Oh dear….too bad we don’t have corn in our salaries, paychecks, or commissions.

Last I knew and I admit I don’t know much, corn or corn byproducts were not in gasoline. So how does the drought in the Midwest which is destroying the corn crop, cause the weekly rise in gas prices?  That’s one hell of a domino theory!

Or are we paying more at the pump because Syria is in the midst of a civil war?  Or because Spain’s economy is slipping away although I doubt we import much gasoline from Spain.  Maybe it’s because Greece is still not out of the economic woods or because Brazil is enjoying a robust economy.   

Food for thought in the form of Amuse Bouche du Jour!  I’m assuming many people know more about this than me – See articles below.

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Chilled Gazpacho on a hot summer night!

There’s usually a modicum of truth and fact in every  trite phrase and/or axiom.   So here we have an age-old saying; “Too Many Cooks Spoil the Broth”.  According to Wikipedia, the definition of this phrase is:

“If too many people try to take charge at a task, the end product might be ruined.
also this means that where there are too many people trying to do something they make a mess of it.”

Well,… NOT ALWAYS!

Yesterday my cousin Janet and her husband, Danny and my cousin Marian stopped by for a visit on their way home from a short stay in Cape May.  I knew they were coming (I should have baked a cake) so I got up early and took off for the fruit and vegetable stand to buy the ingredients for Gazpacho.  It was already ridiculously hot and although this was MY day off and I wanted to get some tan, I knew they would not want to go to the beach.   And that by the way has been the story of my summer so far, but that’s another story!

I had several other grocery stops to make before they arrived  because I certainly did not want to attempt to move the car on Saturday and lose my parking space – Hey I thought I was in Ocean Grove, not Manhattan! Anyway by the time I got the Gazpacho slightly underway they arrived.  My kitchen was in the throes of a Julia  Child meltdown, bowls everywhere, knives of all sizes out, cutting boards galore….well I sat Danny down with the New York Times and my cousins and I repaired to the kitchen.

Luckily  I come from a family of capable cooks and cleaner-uppers and so without much discussion, soon all three of us were busily chopping, juicing, peeling, slicing and mixing.  Sounds like a well-oiled machine right? Or at least a kitchen with competent line cooks.  Well, that’s a half truth since we are all competent but we didn’t have set places in the line!!  If you are a cook, you are beginning to get the picture.

Added to the fact that 3 cooks in the kitchen are inevitably in each other’s way, we compounded the problems by the fact that we were creating two dishes and some of the ingredients were the same.  Pretty soon the kitchen was humming with the sound of food processor as Janet ran the tomatoes, peppers, onions, and cucumber through the machine.  Peter arrived with the much-needed tomato juice (I had forgotten to buy it-it wasn’t on the list) and I kept running back and forth between my two recipe cards trying to explain to Marian how to make the Tuna-Fennel-Bean salad. She’s mincing where we should be chopping and also telling me that the recipe didn’t call for this much of this or that.  I wanted to expand the recipe so it would feed all five of us.  Then I realized I didn’t have enough lemon juice but Janet who travels with a well-stocked pantry in her car, runs out and comes back with a lemon.   So now we are adding lemon juice to both recipes, zesting into the Tuna dish and rinsing beans.  I look at the front of the recipe card and realize I don’t have any chives;(something I had promised myself I would check before I left for the store.  OK, we all agree, Gazpacho without chives will still be great.  However, Marian does mention that probably when we all taste it, we’ll  agree it should have had chives.  The parsley is out on the counter…. I zip over to where Marian is working at the kitchen table and look at that recipe card and realize I don’t have  any scallions!  Geez, who the heck made the grocery list???  Consensus of cousins decide to use onion powder and not fresh onion because Danny can’t eat them raw.  I had considered going out to my lawn where wild onions grow and use the stalks.

Now here’s where things began to fall apart.  I had committed to opening the door to a friend’s house for a delivery.  The time had come to do so.  Since I was elbow-deep in peeling and chopping hot tomatoes that I had just peeled, I sent Peter and Danny to do so.  NO, I did NOT have the address, I just knew where it was.  That was a predictable disaster.  Peter calls me from his cell phone to say there is no beige house, there is no delivery truck.  Thinking this is typical Peter I yell at him and hang up.   He calls back saying he can’t find it so in exasperation, I tell him to come back and pick me up.  I’m pretty sure my cousins can handle the kitchen without me.  Long story short-I had given him the wrong street.

When I returned the kitchen was practically cleaned up. Janet was washing bowls, Marian was drying, the food processor had disappeared.  Wow, they are fast and efficient.  I look around and see the parsley still out and tell Janet, “uh oh, we forgot to put the parsley in”.  Not to worry, we will chop it up fine and throw in.  Then I turn the card over (you see I am the only one checking the recipe) and once again the big “UH OH” comes out. We didn’t put the olive oil or the red wine vinegar in either! Yes we can add it BUT by now the batch of Gazpacho was too big for one bowl so I had taken some out to put in another bowl.  So just what proportions should I be adding red wine vinegar and olive oil?? Competent cook know what to do and when to punt…. The Tuna-Fennel-Bean salad has come together, the last of the tomato mess in the kitchen has been cleaned up (although this morning I found tomato splash spots on the toaster) and God, it must be time for a drink!

When Janet and Danny visit, we have a tradition of drinking Mojitos of which Danny is the master maker.  I pick some mint from the yard, assemble the rum, limes, muddler and seltzer.  Mmmm there doesn’t seem to be that much rum which I was sure I had, and then realized I had more dark rum (for Dark & Stormy’s).  Janet says not to worry because of course she has rum in the car – I told you she traveled with a pantry.  I take out my simple syrup which Janet has deemed not sweet enough so she goes out to the car and brings back a container of syrup – see what I mean!

And here’s where I’m going to end my story. We had drinks, we yakked, we sat down to eat. EVERYTHING was delicious!  It would have been nice to have a crusty loaf of French or Italian bread but we didn’t and still the meal was a communal success!

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This image shows a red wine glass.

Could be Chianti, or a Bordeaux or a Pinot Noir Mmmmm

Today’s the day to celebrate the grape! Nectar of the gods, fruit of the vine, delightful, delectable and divine is WINE.

I grew up in an Italian household so drinking red wine with meals was de riguer and when I was married the first time, we drank red table wine every night with our dinner.  It’s funny to think back on that now as it seems it was truly another lifetime ago….

Here’s what Punchbowl has to say about today:

National Wine Day

Today is National Wine Day! Wine has been an important part of human history and culture for thousands of years. Regardless of whether you prefer red, white, pinot, or cabernet, everyone can appreciate today’s celebration. Spread the news about this unique occasion with a free Wine Day eCard!

Archaeologists in Speyer, Germany discovered the oldest bottle of wine in existence while excavating two Roman stone sarcophaguses in 1867. The bottle dates back to at least 325 AD! It is now on display at the History Museum of the Pfalz in Germany.

To celebrate National Wine Day, find out if there are any events going on at your local winery or plan your very own wine tasting party for you and your friends!

However, if wine is not your thing, other reasons to celebrate today include, National Brown-Bag-It Day, National Tap Dance Day and International Geek Pride Day.   So if you’re going to the office today, bring your lunch, tap dance down the hall and give your IT guy a hug!

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Deutsch: Bleistiftspitze English: Pencil tip

Deutsch: Bleistiftspitze English: Pencil tip (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Did you ever see an old pencil?  Well of course you did… you could tell it was old because it had advertising on it and and the phone number was DIamond 436-6871.  Diamond?? Yes kids, telephone exchanges used to be designated by words.  Usually just the first two letters or sometimes three letters of the word.  Growing up, my exchange was DIamond, my husband’s was    TEmpleton .

You can also tell when a pencil is old because it’s more than likely round and a color other than yellow.  And then of course the eraser is a dead giveaway.  Atrophied, hard as a rock, blackened and totally unusable.

BUT the pencil….!!! If it’s dull all you have to do is sharpen it and it will write just like it was a newbie fresh out of a box.  And it doesn’t matter whether the pencil is a vintage No. 2 Farber or a stub of an old giveaway.  Once sharpened, you can write with this pencil today, tomorrow, a year from now, 25 years from now and it always writes the same way.  It doesn’t deteriorate with old age.  It doesn’t wrinkle, sag, lose its sight and hearing or for that matter, its hair, its arteries don’t harden although its head does!

It will write in cursive, block print or anything in between you scribble.

Think about it….wouldn’t you like to age like a pencil?

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SURREAL may be an understatement for this exquisite commercial!  Can you imagine using that adjective to describe a TV ad?  I can hardly believe I’m writing a blog about it, but I am. 

Cartier has produced a spectacular commercial aptly titled L’Odyssée de Cartier.  Their signature leopard leads the viewer through the evolution of the brand.  Amazingly clever, beautifully executed and besides the captivating images, the soundtrack is an absolutely perfect complement to the film. 

I first saw L’Odyssée as a Youtube video and I’ve embedded that link for your viewing pleasure!  Cartier is running an abbreviated version on a couple of major network shows, but it’s nothing compared to the original. You won’t believe the beauty, the cinematography, the music, the woman, the dress!! And we thought Budweiser made clever Super Bowl ads – yeah right!

I was very disappointed when I saw it on TV.  It was like seeing a movie adapted from a book with half the chapters left out.  See for yourself!

L’Odyssée de Cartier

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I remember the Valentine’s Day cards of the 50’s – the ones we exchanged in grammar school (that’s what we called elementary school).  They were mostly funny, sweet, and complete with  sugary clichés.  The Valentine cards shown here are older and speak to a slightly different take on expressing affection.  Can you imagine the phone calls you’d get if you sent your child to school with these today?

Not your average Vegan Valentine!

"Ouch"

Ain't Love Swell?

"Muddy Waters"

Vintage Violent Valentine

Chesterfields no less!

Fuzzy Worms?

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Ever wonder where some of the phrases we use in our everyday language?  I do and in this blog I have often featured phrases that once were common and now are obscure to generation X and Y.  Sometimes a phrase fades away because it’s no longer applicable or contains words that have dropped out of usage.

PULL OUT ALL THE STOPS has come to mean let it all go, or let it all out, or put the force of 100% effort into something.  This past Friday, Peter and I took our granddaughter, Finley, to the Morris Museum in Morristown, NJ.  We really wanted to see their collection of antique music machines and automata.  It is an amazing collection with gorgeous elaborate music boxes of every evolution and Living Dolls and Mechanical Musical Instruments ever since we saw the movie, HUGO.

Now you are wondering what does all that have to do with this blog post?  The early Music Machines operated on a bellows system.  The docent demonstrated several of the mechanical musical machines.  There was  large wooden instrument that worked with bellows and you could adjust the volume  by pulling out a row of stoppers

And there you have it -all the sound was let out, by pulling out all the stoppers!

Antique music box with brass cylinder

French Automaton - Lady Knitting

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